Tuesday 13 March 2007

Cameron "Gays and blacks will pay more tax."

Prime ministerial hopeful, Conservative leader David Cameron today told the legendary Journalist, Sir David "soft question" Frost, that under a future Conservative government the nation's vast army of gays and blacks will have to shoulder a much higher tax burden.


Old Etonian Mr Cameron told a fawning Sir David, that although he and the Shadow Chancellor George Osbourne, hadn't yet begun to crunch the numbers, all early indications point to the very likely possibility of this measure having to be taken.

He justified his proposed tax hikes for the gay/black community by saying, "David, we all know they have been getting away with murder under the present administration, due partly, I believe to the high proportion of gays and blacks sitting on the government's side of the house. In my proposals for the future taxation of said individuals, we will be looking to set their basic rate of tax at around the 85 per cent mark."

When the deeply respectful Sir David gathered his nerve and timidly questioned Mr Cameron on the seemingly high rate of tax mentioned, the nicely spoken Mr Cameron replied, "Well yes, at first glance it may seem harsh David, but when you look into the figures and see who it is who actually uses the Police, fire, ambulance and of course the casualty departments, you are astounded by the remarkably high number of gays and blacks using these services."

News of the proposals have been greeted nationwide as a welcome move and has led to worried Labour party officials hastily preparing their own gay/black tax proposals.

A spokesman for the Parliamentary Labour party was quick to affirm that the government was indeed looking into this matter long before the Conservatives had thought of using it for political advantage, and went on to say that, "This was originally an idea proposed in cabinet by the Deputy Prime minister John Prescott, he has long been in favour of what he termed the 'puff's and darkies tax', but at the time he first proposed it there was a lot of opposition within the cabinet and the prime minister decided to put it on the back burner."

No comments: