Alaska - A red faced White House was today trying to extricate its self from the latest in a long line of verbal gaffes and scandals, the president's Tourette's has thrust them into.
Early yesterday morning the president was touring the site of a new oil refinery scheduled to be built sometime in 2008 upon tribal burial grounds sacred to the local Inuit people, the President was overheard telling a close aide to, "Get me the fuck outta here, I'm freezing my balls off and these rat faced snow pigs make me feel sick."
These remarks where overheard by members of the press corps and sections of the three strong Inuit crowd that had gathered to protest the building of the oil refinery.
A visibly shocked Inuit chief named Yellow Snow said, "I think it's not right what the big white chief said, Yellow Snow will not vote for great chief Bush again, can you give Yellow Snow money for booze now?"
White House attempts to downplay the episode have only seen the scandal snowball and dominate the international headlines. In a desperate move designed to kill the story White House spokesman, Fuzzy Klebermann faced reporters questions early this morning in a hastily arranged press conference.
When asked by reporters if these remarks by the president revealed a contempt for the native people's of the Arctic region, Mr Klebermann countered with, "Nothing could be further from the truth, the President has nothing but the utmost respect for his coldest citizens, indeed only last week the President had refused to go to bed until he seen the end of a National Geographic film about penguins."
This explanation did nothing to soothe the usually timid and subservient Washington press pack and Mr Klebermann was asked by one unusually pretty lady reporter to explain the "snow pig" comment.
Mr Klebermann answered that, "It has all been a huge misunderstanding, the president thought snow pigs was the local term for the mosquitoes that were bothering him at the time."
This seemed to satisfy the baying press pack and they quickly resumed their normal lap dog like demeanours and moved onto less pressing issues like Iraq.
1 comment:
Sad!
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